Posts Tagged ‘single


12 Gay Men to Run From

I’m unabashedly taking a cue from fellow lovesite, Tango, and their 10 Men to Run From – Not After, because the man-on-man dating landscape is just as treacherous, and filled with traps.  If you like to date just to date, and screw, consider this a walk down memory lane, and congrats.  You’re probably better at the delineation between tricks and boyfriends than I ever was.  If you date with an eye to commitment, monogamy, and a Crate and Barrel registry, take heed.  Here’s a list of whom not to do, based on my own experiences.

  1. The Closeted: Apologies in advance, but dating a closeted man is the funny uncle to dating a married man.  It even feels pretty much the same, especially around the holidays, no matter how good and kind he is, or how he tries to make it seem otherwise.  (See also 2, and 3.)  Come out boys, it’s 2008. Continue reading ’12 Gay Men to Run From’

Don’t Get Trapped in Your Type

I know a guy – I’ll call him Ted (and that’s not him in the picture) – who only dates butch, oral, total gym rat bottoms one would find in a Tom of Finland drawing. Oh, and they should be naturally smooth. And wealthy. And from the Midwest would be good. And under 40, but over 30. I’ve got news: that guy’s busy.

In spite of the fact that Sam and I know a lot of single guys, I’ve never been good at matching them up. I have pointed Ted in the direction of a few quality guys, and the reply has been, “not big enough, not muscular, not butch enough, too old.” and this is from a guy who doesn’t even fit all of his own criteria. Continue reading ‘Don’t Get Trapped in Your Type’


Nominate America’s Gay Bachelor

picture-16.png is looking for the handsomest and most sophisticated men in the U.S. to be America’s Gay Bachelor. They’ve started with a state-by-state eligible gay bachelor hunt with an eye to naming one of their hot catches America’s Gay Bachelor™ of the Year.

Continue reading ‘Nominate America’s Gay Bachelor’


Hot Guys You Can Actually Meet: Matthew

Le très chaud Matthew

“I am a 28 year-old actor, home in the states after 4 years acting, working and studying at the Sorbonne in Paris; looking for the right grad school now. I’ve lived in Europe for 8 years now, but love being back in the good ol’ States. I speak German, Italian and French really well; and study latin every day too. I guess I am nerd; but a good actor. My passion? Swimming and the mountains! (oxymoronic, I know) And all night long, slow sex.”

Geil! And if that doesn’t have you going, he offers his AIM screen name freely to anyone who’d like to buddy him. Continue reading ‘Hot Guys You Can Actually Meet: Matthew’


Hot Guys You Can Actually Meet: Michael


Michael, above, has it all going on: hot, talented, smart, collects robots, and wants more than just the exterior from a partner. Plus, he’s a little ‘dark’, which makes the sex really, really hot. Continue reading ‘Hot Guys You Can Actually Meet: Michael’


Ladies: Tim Ferriss is the Modern Man… and Single.

Tim Ferriss DancingTim Ferriss is kind of a big deal. Just ask him, or Sam. Sam is very single-threaded about Tim Ferriss right now. He’s the modern Prince of outsourcing, and evidently a good kisser. In much the same way as America has outsourced millions of jobs to countries with citizens who will happily work for peanuts, Tim outsources his life, and not just his work life, even dating:

“I hired virtual teams of people all over the world… to compete against each other and set dates for me on an online calendar… and there would be a $150 bonus to whichever team set the most good dates.“

There is nothing that money can’t buy. Finding a “date manager” to set up dates, and paying the guy a commission for each date he goes on. Why is this not the second oldest profession? Dating can be hell, especially for busy, high-value bucks like Tim Ferriss, but I say there is something to enjoying the process, meeting interesting (and not so interesting) people, maybe even making some platonic friends, and not being simply focused on the goal. Maybe I’m just luckier at love, since I’m happily married to Sam, a genuine all-around. So anyway back to Tim. Evidently the date managers filled up his datebook pretty quickly, because later he made an online appeal to his readers to come up with the best date ideas for under $500, and in return for readers’ romantic ideas, he generously offered some copies of his book to give as Christmas gifts – “some of them autographed.”

Hell, if it works out, I’m sure he knows exactly whom to hire in South Africa to find the best Kimberley diamond and ship it to Israel to be cut and set by the finest jewelers. This guy has it down. Then on to the wedding planner…

But this modern man doesn’t stop there. Tim’s most recent tentpole is the reclamation of the masculine ideal, or at least the reclamation of an article about the masculine ideal, is one “outsourced” from Esquire, entitled “Why I Started Punching Jerks Again,” and aiming to bring back the golden age of manly men with passages like:

“I think a little fisticuffs would do most men a world of good, giving options to the masses who put up with too much, consequences to loudmouthed idiots who would then think twice, and a release valve to a gender that otherwise comes up with far worse things to do to men, women, wives, and children.”

It’s interesting reading that really made me question why I’m not letting my dukes do more of the talking, and I think I even got a little aroused. But I digress. This topic really hits home with Tim, who describes himself:

“Born premature and small throughout school, I was on the receiving end of hazing for more than a decade, but I put up a good fight. Being small didn’t mean I couldn’t operate in a world with a line that, once crossed, meant you had to put up or shut up.”

I totally get it. Think Scrappy-Doo. Being held just beyond swinging distance with a hand to your forehead has to suck. I had a very similar experience, being called ‘fag’ pretty much daily through middle and high school, but again I must have been lucky, because never once did it ever come to blows, and actually I wound up befriending and non-violently winning the respect of every bully who ever gave me a hard time. Literally every one. No cowering. No forfeiture of lunch money. No fisticuffs. I believe nice guys finish first.

Maybe it’s because I was always tall, like Scooby-Doo, that I fared better, or maybe it was when they realized I was friends with all the hot girls, and could make introductions. No matter what it was, it’s just another part of my life for which I’m grateful.

I can’t imagine why Tim Ferriss hasn’t found the right woman (and he’s very, very clear about his ‘ladies only’ dating policy). I mean, he’s skilled in wrestling and ballroom dancing, has a degree from Princeton, a book on the NYT bestseller list, is a Glycemic Index researcher (so he can help you with your diet), an MTV breakdancer in Taiwan, an actor on a hit TV series in mainland China, he’s kinda hot, and knows how to throw down if you get disrespected.

Billy’s Sorted Past

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