Archive for the '573 Physical anthropology' Category

06
Jun
08

I am happily aberrant.

I was standing at the urinal today, when a funny thought crossed my mind: I sleep with, and am married to a man.

I know, I know. Obvious. Stupid even.

If the most important, innate desire of an animal is to reproduce itself, I’m putting my goo in the wrong places – every chance I get. A lot of people have a problem with that, including the first girl I put my goo in. I cast her out of my life because she thinks God is an angry thug, but I digress.

Nonetheless, she thinks I’m a perversion, a defective, mis-wired human being, whose most basic drive is flawed. Except I’m not. I know exactly where to put my goo if I wish to reproduce, and the blessing is that if and when I do it, I’ll be doing it purposefully. After all, reproduction is not love, and love is not reproduction, even though there are many handy examples of people who believe the words are interchangeable. Continue reading ‘I am happily aberrant.’

16
Apr
08

Hummers are for Guys with Small Cocks

Leave it to the French to finally say what people around the world have only thought. Hummers are for guys with small cocks. If I’m wrong, prove it. Send me a picture of yourself standing next to your Hummer. Block out your face, and whip it out for the camera – and it had better be huge.

Include a line in the email saying I can publish it, because I will.

‘A 4×4 isn’t anything but a substitute for a penis!’ laughs one of France’s infamous ‘Deflators’. ‘A car which consumes a lot, a luxury, an accessory, Continue reading ‘Hummers are for Guys with Small Cocks’




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