Archive for the 'gay' Category



21
Jul
08

Mommie Dearest vs. The Dark Knight

The Dark Knight is sold out, solid, all over town, so Sam and I stayed in this weekend and tried to approximate the experience as best we could, by watching Mommie Dearest.

The first time I saw Mommie Dearest was within a year of the premiere, but on HBO, at home. I was 12 or 13. Soon thereafter, I got into a fight with Mom and called her “Mommy Dearest.” It earned me the requisite slap across the face. God, how dramatic. In fact, we both realized we’d been caught up in a wave of self-concocted drama and busted out laughing. How Camp. (That link, btw, is the best intellectual discussion of Camp, ever.) Continue reading ‘Mommie Dearest vs. The Dark Knight’

21
Jul
08

I Am Reminded That I’m Gay When…

I have a 24-pak of candelabra-base, flame-tip light bulbs in the garage, and I can offer almost any other sized bulb in two different color temperatures. Continue reading ‘I Am Reminded That I’m Gay When…’

25
Jun
08

Don’t Get Trapped in Your Type

I know a guy – I’ll call him Ted (and that’s not him in the picture) – who only dates butch, oral, total gym rat bottoms one would find in a Tom of Finland drawing. Oh, and they should be naturally smooth. And wealthy. And from the Midwest would be good. And under 40, but over 30. I’ve got news: that guy’s busy.

In spite of the fact that Sam and I know a lot of single guys, I’ve never been good at matching them up. I have pointed Ted in the direction of a few quality guys, and the reply has been, “not big enough, not muscular, not butch enough, too old.” and this is from a guy who doesn’t even fit all of his own criteria. Continue reading ‘Don’t Get Trapped in Your Type’

17
Jun
08

Sam and I are Married (Again)

6:35AM Sam is in the shower and we’re getting ready to go into West Hollywood to be legally married in the state of California. We don’t really know what to expect: if it will be a circus or what, but we’re going to find out.

7:25AM Sam’s pulling up news. Obama just spoke in a clip. “I believe marriage is between a man and a woman,” he said. I don’t get it. So who says it’s between a man and a woman? The bible. Okay, what was thing about the separation of church and state again??? We’re leaving now.

Given the right reasons and the right two people, marriage is a wonderful way of experiencing your life. – George Carlin

6:16PM We waited about 7 hours, and were married around 4pm. It was worth the wait a hundred times over. We are married husbands in accordance with the law of the vanguard State of California. Hooray! We did several interviews including one for the Japanese national news and another for one of the networks, in Spanish. I had no idea I’d retained so much. Thanks to my high school Spanish teachers, Rosaura Cantú and Ernesto Suarez. There were only a handful of haters there, but they disbanded after about two hours. We made some new friends in line, and generally speaking, it was a love fest. More details and photos to follow. Thanks to all for your love and support. xo, Billy

16
Jun
08

Define Yourself Above the Waist: A Primer for Coming Out

I know a lot of people struggle with ‘the closet’. I know that coming out can be a very big deal, and certainly, coming out in a small town is very different than coming out in a major metropolitan area, where the LGBT help make the city tick, but a lot of these blogs are written by men in NYC, LA, Chicago, Miami, where we gays aren’t a novelty. Just the same, the writers act as if they’re the first homo on Earth, and nobody else could possibly understand how difficult it is for them. Bullshit. We’ve all done it.

I’d like to offer some unsolicited coaching.

Continue reading ‘Define Yourself Above the Waist: A Primer for Coming Out’

10
Jun
08

Best Pride Ever

I’ve never liked Pride, and I thought I’d rather have a thumb in my eye than march in a parade. Who knew I’d have as much fun as I did this past weekend, marching in the Pride parade with the GSGRA. Sam, Sonny, and I carried state flags and represented the rodeo.

Funny thing being in a parade. The presumption is that there’s a reason why you’re in it, and why people would care. So the spectators give you this once-over, just to make sure that you’re somebody to them, and then the onus is on you to be somebody, with a smile or a wink, or a holler, so that’s exactly what we did.

We finished up the parade route early, rolled and tubed the flags, headed for The Abbey and tipped a few in honor of pride, our right to marry, our friendship with Sonny, and the rodeo. Sam was right. It’s more fun being in the parade than watching it, but then, I guess that’s no surprise. Kinda like life.

Here are some snaps from the weekend. Continue reading ‘Best Pride Ever’

06
Jun
08

I am happily aberrant.

I was standing at the urinal today, when a funny thought crossed my mind: I sleep with, and am married to a man.

I know, I know. Obvious. Stupid even.

If the most important, innate desire of an animal is to reproduce itself, I’m putting my goo in the wrong places – every chance I get. A lot of people have a problem with that, including the first girl I put my goo in. I cast her out of my life because she thinks God is an angry thug, but I digress.

Nonetheless, she thinks I’m a perversion, a defective, mis-wired human being, whose most basic drive is flawed. Except I’m not. I know exactly where to put my goo if I wish to reproduce, and the blessing is that if and when I do it, I’ll be doing it purposefully. After all, reproduction is not love, and love is not reproduction, even though there are many handy examples of people who believe the words are interchangeable. Continue reading ‘I am happily aberrant.’




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