I love you, Hillary. I’m just not *IN* love with you.

I love Hillary Clinton. I love Bill Clinton. Chelsea should have done something really conspicuously fabulous by now, like making a guest appearance on Nip/Tuck or joining Brangelina in New Orleans, but I digress.

Hillary is a brilliant woman, a political machine – formidable. She hits every talking point like an Olympic archer and her knowledge is encyclopedic but she couldn’t motivate me to wait in a two-hour line to see her, much less write a check or volunteer. (Say nothing of the fact that she’s a scorpio, and in my experience they can be a little, um, less than transparent. [sorry, Nick])

There’s no specific opportunity of which I speak; I just wanted to put it into terms we could all understand. While I wouldn’t exactly camp out in a line overnight for any politician, I would definitely pack up some cards and magazines and sit with Sam in a line for a few hours to see Obama. I’d write a check. I’d volunteer.

I’ve seen Tori Amos in concert around 10 times. Manson, 2. Fiona, 7. More or less, I know what to expect from them. They’re brilliant, but I know the catalogue, and unless they do a new cover of something interesting, I know that at very least that Sam’s going to dig it and my concert budget has been safely spent.

On the other hand, I’ve never seen Seal in concert, and I’d probably go to some lengths to do so. We’d never seen Madonna until last year, although seeing the mother of reinvention once does not necessarily guarantee the same Madonna the next time, but you get the point.

Neither Obama or Clinton corner the market on being a historic president, but I can’t help but feel that by marriage, Clinton is a little less historic. She’s not all new. No matter what she wears, it’ll always be indelibly besmirched by Bill’s intern-in-a-blue-dress money shot.

Even if I’m not the one chattering about dynasties and casting aspersions about what Bill is doing backstage as First Gentleman, a lot of people will be. I’m tired of doubtful static dividing the country and vilifying us to the rest of the world. That’s the static that I don’t believe Hillary will be able to fully clear, and the reason I don’t believe she’ll be president.

Experience schmexperience, presidents are figureheads – a focal point for the synergy of his or her cabinet and advisors, which is why the Bush administration is the death star, and why even a green-by-DC-standards Obama has me saying, “Yes, we can.”

It must be unthinkable to have come as far as Hillary has and be expected to throw in the towel, but if she were truly a patriot, she’d call it off and get into the Obama camp. We’ve had eight years with unbridled ego at the wheel, the Reps have an affable two-term indumbent, and are focused on their nominee. Let’s stop the infighting that just makes us look divided and Hillary look desperate, and win this thing by a landslide.

or email me at lovesickbilly@mac.com

6 Responses to “I love you, Hillary. I’m just not *IN* love with you.”

  1. Wednesday, March 5, 2008 at 3:21 pm

    You took the words right out of my mouth. Well said, Cowboy.

  2. 2 Joe Shmo
    Wednesday, March 5, 2008 at 7:21 pm

    I don’t find Obama’s speeches very inspiring at all. Maybe that’s because I hate all politicians and feel that they’re all totally self serving. That includes Hillary, but I feel she’s actually got the balls to get the stuff done. Obama just doesn’t seem that strong to me. I will vote for whoever gets the nomination, but I know that Hillary will walk into that oval office and get the ball rolling immediately. She won’t have to marvel at the architecture and splendour of the White House. Been there done that.

    My real question is who is going to be in charge of the White House Christmas decorations if there is no First Lady??? I can’t imagine Bill taking on that! 🙂

  3. Wednesday, March 5, 2008 at 7:25 pm

    a legion of interns, of course.

  4. Wednesday, March 5, 2008 at 8:03 pm

    If Hilary wins, Bill is in-charge of the kitchen. Burger King, Yeah!

  5. 5 K
    Wednesday, March 5, 2008 at 9:05 pm

    I agree with this entire post except the Scorpio part…thats not nice!

    I can totally be trusted…..haha!

  6. Thursday, March 6, 2008 at 8:55 am

    K, I never said ‘trust’. I said ‘less than transparent’. Truth is I find that scorpios often play it very close to the vest… they have a hidden agenda, another side, etc. Isn’t that something with which you can identify? 🙂

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