12 Gay Men to Run From

I’m unabashedly taking a cue from fellow lovesite, Tango, and their 10 Men to Run From – Not After, because the man-on-man dating landscape is just as treacherous, and filled with traps.  If you like to date just to date, and screw, consider this a walk down memory lane, and congrats.  You’re probably better at the delineation between tricks and boyfriends than I ever was.  If you date with an eye to commitment, monogamy, and a Crate and Barrel registry, take heed.  Here’s a list of whom not to do, based on my own experiences.

1. The Closeted: Apologies in advance, but dating a closeted man is the funny uncle to dating a married man.  It even feels pretty much the same, especially around the holidays, no matter how good and kind he is, or how he tries to make it seem otherwise.  (See also 2, and 3.)  Come out boys, it’s 2008.

Breaking Bread with General Hospital’s Julius, a.k.a. Gregory Zarian

You can get a great French baguette at 4151 Prospect Avenue, in Hollywood, even though it’s not a bakery. It’s the office of the executives who work on General Hospital for ABC.

GH fans, and particularly Julius fans, are really dedicated. They want Julius back, and are going to any length to make it happen, including sending French baguettes to the execs. Why baguettes? If you’re not a GH watcher, it’s all explained here in my interview with Gregory Zarian who played Julius, and won the hearts of thousands of adoring fans. Check out the video below, one of many posted to YouTube, and feel the love.

Gregory is actually a friend of mine, and he was happy to tell me (and you) all about the campaign to BRING JULIUS BACK, answer the Lovesick Questions, and clarify the whole baguette thing for those of us who aren’t devoted GH fans… yet.

Sam and Bronson by Tom Bianchi

In late March, Sam and I were invited to Tom Bianchi‘s home in Palm Springs to be photographed for one of his upcoming Bianchi Men collections. It was an honor and a privilege, and a learning experience that transcended the photography itself. Tom shared with us the philosophy behind his art.

It’s always fun to be shot with Sam, and I was thrilled that Tom was recording the last fleeting days of my thirties. This was the week before my 40th birthday.

The photos have arrived, and Sam and I are really pleased. I think they really capture the excitement of the day, and the intimacy Sam and I share. I love the ones with Sam reading Tom’s copy of Where the Wild Things Are, dedicated to him by his friend, Maurice Sendak. Tom said he’d send one to Maurice, and Sam was thrilled. So here are the shots I can share with you. Warning: if you click here, you will see our butts.

Now That We Can All Marry, Why Aren’t We?

Sam and I wasted no time getting legally married.  We were in line, in the sun on 6/17, doing our best to ignore the handful of shouting haters in attendance and making friends in line.  The haters left after just a couple of hours.  Perfect.

Since then, we’ve encouraged our other partnered friends to tie the legal knot, and so far, only one has followed suit.  While their presence at our wedding in April, 2007 kinda cinched it for them, I’m sure they’d planned to marry legally before we spoke to them.

Is Lindsay Lohan Going To Marry Samantha Ronson?

Huzzah. I knew I loved that girl. This is great news. Coming out should save her thousands in rehab, and may just be saving her life.

God knows why they know about it overseas first, but, China Daily, Trans World News, and Yell Malta are echoing British tabloids with the news that Lindsay and Samantha are getting married in L.A. this year. Plus, check out Facebook.

Samantha Ronson is a DJ, sister of killer record producer, Mark Ronson, and arguably the luckiest lesbian in the world.

I wish you girls all the best. You’re a beautiful couple.

Let love rule.

10 Things I Should Have Been Taught in High School

1. Fools usually want to be fooled.
2. The road to hell is paved with credit cards.
3. Exercise and flossing are a pain in the ass, but they beat obesity and food through a straw.
4. Go to college. Period. It makes up for the shitty education you got in grade school, and besides, you’re not as grown-up as you think you are.
5. It’s up to you, and not your parents, what you major in, compete in, and put your dick in.
6. Trust your instincts, and hone them with the mistakes you make by not trusting them.

The Birth of Your Sexual Type

I recently learned that the orgasm is a powerful tool for classical conditioning; a tool that you already use effectively to shape your own behavior, whether you realize it or not.

It goes something like this: as a teen, you find some hot photo of a blond guy, wearing camos and a white t-shirt, and it gets you aroused. New to this, it doesn’t take you long to rub one out, and when you do, your eyes happen to settle on a specific part of the model: the tight t-shirt, the buttocks, whatever. The next time you bring out the pinup you (consciously or subconsciously) remember that you came when we focused on that part, so you do it again and, voilá. Pounding ‘em out over the blond with the killer ass in the cargos works for you.

The next thing you know you’re online looking for military porn. You find it, and you rub one out real good, and this time you notice the girth of his tan, blond-furred calves tapering down into white socks and combat boots, and POW! You get it right between the eyes.

Sam and I are Married (Again)

6:35AM Sam is in the shower and we’re getting ready to go into West Hollywood to be legally married in the state of California. We don’t really know what to expect: if it will be a circus or what, but we’re going to find out.

7:25AM Sam’s pulling up news. Obama just spoke in a clip. “I believe marriage is between a man and a woman,” he said. I don’t get it. So who says it’s between a man and a woman? The bible. Okay, what was thing about the separation of church and state again??? We’re leaving now.

Given the right reasons and the right two people, marriage is a wonderful way of experiencing your life. – George Carlin

6:16PM We waited about 7 hours, and were married around 4pm. It was worth the wait a hundred times over. We are married husbands in accordance with the law of the vanguard State of California. Hooray! We did several interviews including one for the Japanese national news and another for one of the networks, in Spanish. I had no idea I’d retained so much. Thanks to my high school Spanish teachers, Rosaura Cantú and Ernesto Suarez. There were only a handful of haters there, but they disbanded after about two hours. We made some new friends in line, and generally speaking, it was a love fest. More details and photos to follow. Thanks to all for your love and support. xo, Billy

Define Yourself Above the Waist: A Primer for Coming Out

I know a lot of people struggle with ‘the closet’. I know that coming out can be a very big deal, and certainly, coming out in a small town is very different than coming out in a major metropolitan area, where the LGBT help make the city tick, but a lot of these blogs are written by men in NYC, LA, Chicago, Miami, where we gays aren’t a novelty. Just the same, the writers act as if they’re the first homo on Earth, and nobody else could possibly understand how difficult it is for them. Bullshit. We’ve all done it.

I’d like to offer some unsolicited coaching.

CA Supreme Court To Rule on Same-Sex Marriage

This note just in from Lorri L. Jean, the CEO of the Los Angeles Gay and Lesbian Center:

California same-sex couples may be on the verge of tasting the sweetness of equality when they bite into their wedding cakes!

Any day now, perhaps even this Thursday, the California Supreme Court will issue its ruling on same-sex marriage, deciding whether gay men and lesbians in our state can finally—with the full extent of the law behind their words—ask their partner, “Will you MARRY me?”